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You Know You're A Karaoke Junkie If...
  Be on the lookout for those Dallas Ft Worth karaoke junkies  

You've heard the song "Boondocks" by Little Big Town at least 10 times

You're willing or offer to do a duet with ANYONE!

No one recognizes you without your hat and/or your shades

You can hold a cigarette or a beer bottle with one hand while holding the mic with the other

You're one of the few who's tipped the KJ

Going to a karaoke bar by yourself feels like 2nd nature

Youíve ever burned up a car to get to karaoke

Youíre broke all the time

You clap when a song finishes on the radio

You ever wake up from a sound sleep clapping

Strangers walk up to you in Wal-mart and compliment you on your singing

People you donít know ask, "Arenít you the karaoke dude?"

You get mad when you are skipped in the rotation

Songs on the radio donít sound right because Ernest or Roger arenít singing them

You hear a song on the radio and think, thatís number 7-12

You donít wear "the hat" and nobody knows you

Somebody says, "why donít we leave early?" and the whole crowd gasps(and early is 12:30 am)

You refer to "my list" ten months after youíve sold out

You find yourself engrossed in the philosophical ramifications of "AMERICAN PIE"

You go to a concert and wonder when theyíre gonna call you up to sing

You go to a concert and all the time youíre thinking "I could do that"

You write lists like this on the back of karaoke slips

Last call comes and you say "But Iím not through singing yet!"

Youíve ever been taken home passed out in the back of a 69 Cadillac hearse

Youíve ever ripped the door off a bar

You have laryngitis and you still try to sing

Blue drinks turn you into the INCREDIBLE HULK

You know youíve got to get up at 6:30 am and you still close the bar down

Thereís 12 inches of snow on the ground and ice on the roads and where are you? THE KARAOKE BAR!

You think "life without the role" are really the words

Someone asks you if you have a slip, and theyíre not talking about underwear!

Someone is writing "WHAT IF" lists during karaoke

You remember the number of over two songs by memory

You know everybodyís first name-and you donít know what their last names are

You know the location of every motel within five miles of the bar.

You donít remember the names of any waitresses before Sharon Peters.

You know the location of every karaoke bar within 50miles of your house.

When youíre not at the karaoke bar by 10:30pm people start calling your house to find out whatís wrong.

You would never consider dating someone with a bad voice.

Anything brighter than neon lights hurts your eyes.

Someone suggests going dancing instead and youíre appalled.

Your stock reply is "you mean thereís a bowling alley here."

That commercial on TV that makes fun of karaoke really makes you mad.

You see karaoke on TV and you think "Thatís not the way itís done!"

You actually know that karaoke means "empty orchestra."

It feels weird to go to a new karaoke bar and not sit at the "regulars" table

You get upset when someone else is sitting in your place

You throw up on somebodyís car---and they understand

You get mad when someone sings "your song"

The songs, "LOVE SHACK", "FRIENDS IN LOW PLACES", and "AMERICAN PIE" really annoy you (unless of course YOU want to sing them)

Someone refers to "the longest song in the book" and you know what theyíre talking about

The word "rotation" no longer conjures up thoughts of tires or sex

Youíve ever browsed the "net" under the heading "KARAOKE"

Youíve ever called a wrecker to take you and your car to the KARAOKE bar (hey it was contest night O.K.!)

You think itís a compliment when someone dedicates "THE BITCH IS BACK" to you

A new person who sings well is automatically your friend

Your new best friend is somebody who does the same type songs as you

You canít name five presidents,---BUT you know all the members of KISS and the EAGLES

The whole bar yells "OH CRAP" when youíre called to sing

You know the entire intro to "BABYíS GOT BACK"

You start believing your middle name is "lucy" or "louise"

You hear "whatís this fat f---er going to sing?" And youíre determined to sing them under the table

Anyone has ever suggested therapy

Youíve ever received an emergency call at the bar

You think you sound better than the origional

You can still sit still after listening to "LOVE SHACK" 5,000 times

Someone throws up because you sang too much ELTON JOHN

You think you can never sing too much ELTON JOHN

Someone suggests an after hours party and you ask "do you have a karaoke machine?"

You canít remember the words to a song youíve heard all your life without "the screen"

You and three other people have sung "FRIENDS IN LOW PLACES" after the karaoke has closed down

The first thing you think when you hear a new song on the radio is "when is this coming out on karaoke?"

You call the karaoke store and hound them about a disk

You buy a karaoke disk for one song---burning 14 other songs

You try to learn 14 songs you donít really like

You consider beer a lubricant for your vocal chords

You consider alcohol to be "Liquid Courage"

It takes you 15 minutes to hug everybody goodbye

Your best friend has to hold you up to sing your last song, and you never miss a note (hey it was TWIST OFF night O.K.!)

You canít sing until youíre nice and toasty

The high point of your week is when your favorite KJ gets a new disk

You cant stand up or walk but you never miss a note

You feel cheated if they donít get karaoke started at 9:00 sharp "bar time"

The term kamikaze has nothing to do with japan or planes

Your house guests get to your house 1-1/2 hours before you do

Youíre a woman but youíre still willing to sing the guys part

Youíre a guy but your still willing to sing Barbaraís part in "NO MORE TEARS"

You may be a karaoke junkie if you are planning to go to a new city and the first thing you do is get on the net and find out where they have karaoke!

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